Are signs of obsessive love easy to spot?
It feels really great when you have someone special by your side, someone who is really important to you and who takes care of you.
It is amazing when the man in your life is everything you have dreamed of and that he gives you all of his love and support.
But there are people who can easily become obsessed with their partner and turn their love into obsessive love.
Love is great. When you finally find someone, who finds all of your little quirks adorable, it’s normal in the early stages to have that person burned into the back of your eyelids and feel intense feelings of passion. After all, you have butterflies in your stomach and you want to see this person again and again.
But over time, the love for one another develops into something less intense, but instead into something permanent.
But while it’s easy to throw yourself into the whirlwind of a new relationship, it’s important to remember that there is a difference between healthy, growing love and an unhealthy obsession.
When you first meet someone, your expectations may have been clouded by romantic movies and books. You probably expect to be blown away and him telling you that he “can’t live without you”. In reality, this may not be what you should aim for.
Unfortunately, people with obsessive love disorder don’t seem to get beyond the infatuation stage and remain overwhelmed by an obsessive desire to own the other person while unable to deal with rejection.
Healthy love is typically associated with an engagement and respect for each other’s needs, including a need for privacy.
To love someone means to give them space
When it comes to being in a relationship, all people want to find someone who is loyal, dedicated, and devoted to him/her. But there is a fine line between obsession and devotion. So how do you recognize if your partner is actually in love with you or just obsessed?
Being totally absorbed in the early stages of a relationship can also be a sign of obsession. Being completely absorbed in someone isn’t necessarily a sign that the partner is abusive, but it’s also not a good sign.
An obsessive passion can pose a greater threat to your relationship than no passion at all.
When someone is in love with you, they trust you. He wants you to be the best version of yourself and only wants good for you. This also means that he gives you space when you need him.
On the other hand, someone obsessed with you will be jealous and possessive. He won’t like it when you develop as a person or become independent because he fears that you will meet someone else and then leave them.
Sign of obsessive love
In some cases, people who love obsessively can stalk their victims, become manipulative, or even physically control the victims.
There are guys who act pretty normal at the beginning of a relationship, but later, for some reason, they start to control you.
They begin to manipulate and convince their partners that they are the only person they need in their life. These men can be very dangerous because what they feel is not love.
They are some of the extreme cases where the initial infatuation turns into love addiction and the other person has no idea that they are dealing with an obsessed person.
Here are a number of tell-tale signs of obsessive love that you should know carefully.
1. Everything is going too fast
If a guy is afraid of losing you, he will act in a way that will ensure you won’t leave him. That can mean he wants to bond very early in the relationship.
In most cases, people aren’t attentive to this. They are more likely to associate those anxious feelings about needing someone with love.
2. He does things to get your approval
Love is mutual. There should be a fairly equal amount of giving and take. But when someone is obsessed, they are likely giving more than they are taking.
In this case, the motivations for giving come more from a desire to please and be recognized than from love.
3. He wants to be in contact with you all the time
Keeping in touch with your partner isn’t necessarily a bad thing. But if he can’t start or end his day without talking to you, it could be obsession, not love.
It’s okay for him to text you while you’re at work asking something important, but constantly asking yourself about things that aren’t important just doesn’t make sense.
Answering all of those texts can take loads of some time, particularly if he is bombarding you on social media too, and you will not be able to concentrate on your work.
Therefore, you’ve got to line some boundaries as a result of if you do not do that currently, you’ll have issues later.
He must understand that he’s not in the middle of your world which there are numerous things in your life that are happening.
He also can pay time together with his friends or family. He will notice a hobby or do one thing that fulfills him. however, he cannot crush you prefer that.
If he continues to do this, you will feel bad about this relationship and you will wish you never met him.
4. He always wants to know where you are right now
It’s good to have a partner who cares about you and cares enough to know what you are doing and where you are going. But there is a fine line between caring and control.
For example, if he always needs to know where you are and who you are with, it can be compulsive behavior. It’s love when he’s considerate and cares about your needs.
If his “caring” starts feeling overwhelming, it is likely obsession and definitely something you should talk to him about.
5. If you reject him, he will get angry
This is one of the most common signs that it is obsessive love.
He just can’t understand that “no” means “no”. And he has to. When you don’t feel like doing something, he can’t just think about himself.
He has to let go of you so you can do things your own way. It’s a good thing and we all need it even when we’re in a relationship. Your free time is what you need and what you deserve, so don’t let a man tell you what to do.
This is neither sensible nor healthy, therefore there square measure some rules you wish to create if you would like your relationship to last.
No matter what quantity he says he loves you, he won’t admit that he’s wrong.
If you discover yourself in a very state of affairs like this, try and visit him commonly and sedately. If that does not calculate, he’s most likely not the correct man for you!
But don’t fret, there square measure many folks out their United Nations agency square measure an ideal match for you and, most significantly, square measure able to cause you to the item of their heart – however in a very healthy means.
6. you’re feeling that he doesn’t absolutely support you If somebody is obsessed with you, they will not just like the concept that square measure you’re growing as an individual or that you just are freelance. as an example, if you get a promotion at work, he might not be therefore happy and upset with you as a result of he’s wondering however your promotion might modification your relationship.
But in healthy love, every partner empowers the opposite to be the simplest version of themselves. a decent partner is going to be happy for you and support you as you grow as a person.
7. He always agrees with you
When someone is obsessed with you, they will agree with everything you say and do, and that’s just to keep you in their life.
It’s a bit boring when your husband says “yes” to everything you have to say.
I’m not saying that the two of you can’t have the same opinion about something, I’m just saying that you can’t do that all the time.
If you feel like he doesn’t want to say what he thinks just so you don’t get mad, that’s a sign of obsessive love.
Such a guy is going to put up with all the things he doesn’t like about you and one day he’ll explode. And the only victim in all of this will be you.
If it is love, your partner will be able, to be honest with you about their own feelings. He won’t worry about losing you if he tells the truth.
I suggest that you talk to him openly and tell him that he can be honest with you, even if the two of you don’t want the same thing. This is how problems in healthy relationships are solved.
8. He adores you, although he hardly knows you
It’s great when you’re a role model to someone, but it’s a little weird when your husband tells you this after your first meeting. This is exactly a sign that is crying out for Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder.
I mean, he hasn’t really gotten to know you yet – how can he judge a book by its cover? His behavior shows pure infatuation mixed with obsession.
If you find yourself in a situation like this, please think twice about whether he is the man you want to go on a second date or maybe even spend your life with.
It’s just a sign that he has no life experience and doesn’t know anything about love.
9. He asserts that you are his soul mate
A guy who talks about marriage and kids after the first date is not a sane person.
Okay, we all dreamed about our wedding day with a hot guy we saw on the street, but actually walking up to that person and starting to talk about it, that’s crazy!
He doesn’t care how you feel about it, because it’s perfectly normal in his head to do something like that.
He “knows” that you are right for him, so he has to be right for you too, right? No way! This is one of the most disturbing signs that he is prone to obsessive love.
He created a scenario in his head over the two of you where everything is ideal, but he forgot one thing – asking for your opinion.
What he has to do is get his shit together before he loses a great girl like you.
10. He wants to spend every free minute with you
I know it feels nice when he wants to spend a lot of time with you at the beginning of your relationship.
But if it’s too much, it’s just too much. He needs to understand that you have your own life and that sometimes you feel the need to be alone.
We all need some alone time and time that we can only spend with our friends and family, including him.
When a person is dominated by their passion, it really is more of an obsession. That is, she forgets her life before the relationship and puts her focus on you. Basically, you become the center of their universe. But that’s not healthy, nor is it love. It’s obsessive love.
A man who does not want to accept his relationships with his friends and family is likely to have mental health issues related to compulsive behavior.
This type of relationship isn’t healthy, so you’d better break the bridges between the two of you before it’s too late.
The last thing you can do is low self-esteem, followed by a broken heart and soul torn to a million pieces!
Closing word
It is so easy to confuse obsession with love because obsession reflects love. But again: Obsessive love arises from fear and fear. Even if someone doesn’t realize it, that fear shows up in their actions.
So, if you are uncomfortable with your partner’s behavior, talk about it. Sometimes people just aren’t aware of the things they’re doing. This open communication can make a relationship a lot healthier.
But don’t forget: you can’t change it! Only he can change his compulsive behavior when he decides it’s time to do it.